The brave choice is to “BE.” The former is not an incomplete sentence. We are just not used to
finishing a sentence with the word “BE.” There has to be a word after “BE.” For example “BE:” better, smarter, stronger, braver, etc. Right? To just “BE” does not seem enough. Or is it?
What does to “BE” mean? It means being. In the present. Observing. Without thinking about the past, nor about the future.
Sounds Easy? But in reality most cannot “BE.” They are too busy regretting the past or worrying about the future.
So why is it hard to “BE?” Fear is the main challenge standing in one’s way to “BE.” Fear of the mistakes and the uncertainty. Fear of rejection. Wanting to be more. Because to “BE” seems not enough.
To “BE” is not convenient. We must fake a few things for people to be satisfied. People want us to
meet their aspirations. “Why can’t you be more…?” Fill the blank with anything. There is always more. So, we try to come across as belonging to a certain category, group, ethnicity, or even religion. We are always taught to meet others’ expectations. But in the plight, one might end up losing touch with self. This pretending should make others happy, or make us happier. As if “being” is not enough. But in reality, it brings more misery. Because if “being” is not enough, nothing will BE.
To “BE” might not be convenient for others or even for you. Sometimes we want to have a different reality. So we fake the truth and become something else other than our true selves. Just to please our ego and others’. What people love or hate is their perception of you. They see who you pretend to “be.” Or who they want you to be. Most cannot see you; Your true self.
But “being” is the only thing that works for you.
So is this you? the true you? or are you trying to be somewhere else, or someone else? How can one tell? luckily there are ways. Try this simple Test:
- Look at the mind. Is it thinking? Or is it observing? Observing is being. Thinking takes you away from “being.”
- Check the emotions. Can you accept how you feel? Acceptance brings “being.” Denial takes it away.
As genuine as it is, the idea of being comfortable with oneself can cause misunderstandings. Some believe that “being” means:
- Not improving.
- Not considering others.
- Using others.
All these misrepresentations of “being” are leading to misery. They fuel feuds, wars, and crimes.
To “BE” is to observe and accept before saying or doing anything. Take a deep breath and do the
simple two-step test above. Then take action. Your action will be authentic once you start “being.” You will never regret that action. Because it will BE truly you.
No person can always “BE.” We all have egos. We get off-center. We overthink the future, reminisce on the past, and reject uncomfortable emotions. Some talk about losing their way, when they mean they are not willing to “BE” in touch with true self. Sometimes we get lost for hours, then get back to being. Sometimes we get lost for years. Some spend their lives chasing mirages of self, when the real self “is,” period.
“Being” is the “Present.” It is a gift. Gates to self are always wide open and “present.” Try it. Take a deep breath, put a smile on your face, and look around you. One trick I learned from Eckhart Tolle to help me appreciate “being” is this: Look at something in front of you. Then shift your focus gently to the empty space between you and that object. Look at the space. Is it not amazing? Once you get amazed you lose touch with the present again. A smile might come to your face. Or even a laugh. That is OK. Back to “Being.” If this makes you feel like a child in awe of this magnificent existence. Maybe that child is you.
“Being” is a choice. we can choose: to BE or not to be. It is a choice. Not a question.